Driving with anxiety

Learning to drive, while dealing with anxiety has been a process, not just learning to drive but learning how to deal with the anxiety that accompanies it.

I took a week off from my weekly lessons because my test got canceled and I decided i haven't take a week off since April, I think I regret it. The anxiety had never gone away completely, I had gotten more comfortable with the situation but the anxiety never truly calmed and after taking a week off my anxiety about going back is worse.

Sometimes I just wish things were easy, that I could just get back on the horse instead on cowering in the corner but if things were easy I wouldn't grow, so here I'm hoping that when the day comes I haven't forgotten what I'm doing.

Yay anxiety....

Driving update 2

So I'm about 13 ish ( I lost count) lessons in and not much has changed. I'm still having really bad anxiety and panic attacks the day and night before and the morning of, but I still get in the car and drive.

I no longer want my instructor to do it all for me as I know I am capable but I still vibrate with anxiety the whole time. (Interesting choice of words me)

We have been talking theory and practical tests which brings a whole different level of panic which sucks but it's something i'll have to deal with eventually, not that knowing that makes it any easy if anything knowing that I have to face it makes it worse.

I don't get as paranoid at traffic lights, ok maybe I do I'm just better at accepting it than before because I do feel slightly more confident than last time I updated. (yay things are looking up)

I'll update again in a few weeks or sooner if anything changes.

In the mean time, if anyone actually reads this and has any advice or idea to help or even a story to share about their experiences, please let me know.

driving update

so I am on my 7th driving lesson and things seem to be going well ( i haven't crashed so i think thats a plus). I'm still having really bad anxiety the day and night before a lesson but I'm doing it, I get in that car and i drive...

my paranoia isn't to bad until I realise what I'm doing and that other people can see, which happens now and then and every time I have to stop at traffic lights, which lucky hasn't been to often.

Im quite happy with my progress so far but being a perfectionist makes it difficult for me to accept anything less than perfect from myself.

The thing about....anxiety

The thing with anxiety is even when you're happy or comfortable with something, it's still there, it's still offering unhealthy and harmful thoughts, still nudging the back of your mind, it doesn't let you forget.
It wants to be felt, it wants you to know.

I am getting better with correcting these thoughts and trying to stop them before they escalate, but it's still a struggle.